“But congratulations to Hillary Clinton, our new secretary of state, who was sworn in holding the Clinton family Bible. And it’s a special edition, because Bill had removed four Commandments.” –David Letterman
“Hillary Clinton’s replacement in the Senate, Kirsten Gillibrand, showed up to their joint press conference sporting a Hillary hairstyle and a nearly identical pantsuit, which explains why Bill Clinton was heard screaming, ‘Good Lord, there’s two of them!'” –Conan O’Brien
“Caroline Kennedy withdrew her bid to fill New York’s vacant Senate seat. You heard about this? According to some reports, she dropped out because of marital problems. How bad is your marriage when it keeps you from replacing Hillary?” –Jay Leno
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